Her first classmate party was last weekend; technically, first AND second, since it was for twin boys from her preschool. It was at their (ginormous) home, and there was a magician and a balloon-animal-making uncle and magic wand painting and all sorts of hilarity. She was good guest, except that teensy moment when we uh, lost her. Briefly! Just briefly... but yeah.
Turned out, she had gone to the potty and managed to lock herself in. One of the other moms, waiting with her kid, helped get the door open. (fail, on my part...her Daddy and I were eating a cupcake. With hand-made marshmallow bunnies on it.)
This week, Monkey was sick (more on that in a later post) so I stayed home with her Tuesday. A day with Mommy *not* working apparently = PARTY.
While I was on the phone with the pediatrician's office, she escaped the family room, only to return wearing: her Easter hat, a Hawaiian lei, eight bangle bracelets and two beaded necklaces. I asked what was up with all that, and was told, with a shrug:
"It's. A. PARTY.... Didn't you call my friends yet?"
So, imagine her three-year-old glee when I announced Wednesday night that we had to stop off at the store on our way home to pick up BIRTHDAY STUFF for one of my co-workers.
(It was for the birthday of the one person in the office who generally plans all that stuff for everyone else...no one remembered, until I figured out late on Wednesday that HER birthday was, in fact, THURSDAY. Could've been an epic fail, but I saved us all the discomfort. Yay, me.)
Monkey seized this opportunity. With gusto.
She actually clapped her hands together, and started rattling off a list of what we were going to get:
"OK! We need... a cake!! And, a card! And- decorations? Yeah, decorations. Balloons! Wrapping paper!! Candles?"
I stopped her there, to say we were getting a card and a cake and that was probably it.
Her disapproval was palpable.
So, we walk into Jewel at the door right by the flowers. They are ALL set up for Valentine's Day.
She walks in, stops dead in her tracks, throws her hands up and says, "WOOOooooo!!!! Wook at dose FWOWERS!!! OOOOOH!" This, in response to a teddy bear bigger than my child, with a vase of red roses and baby's breath.
Fellow shoppers chuckled heartily.
I told her those were pretty, but that's not what we were looking for, and led her to the cards. In her so NOT inside voice, she declares "OK I WILL PICK THE CARD! Look! SPONGEBOB!"
More chuckles from fellow shoppers.
I explained Mommy's friend is a grownup, and probably not that into Spongebob, but we'd see what we could find. So, we kept looking... she enthusiastically grabbed a GIANT Strawberry Shortcake card, and promptly (and LOUDLY) started singing "Straw-ba-babba-berry, Strawberry Shortcake!"
I decided card shopping needed to be done. Like, now-ish.
I finally located the "birthday cards from group" area to pick something suitable for work and not preschool. Monkey was grabbing and/or commenting on every card she saw, until she finally settled on THE ONE.
I was still looking. Triumphantly, she hands me her PERFECT card.
"MOMMY!!! THIS is IT!!!!" With the biggest, proudest grin you can imagine.
So, I think, OK, well, we're in the right section... and look down at the card in my hand.
And at my super-proud preschooler, rocking on her heels in gleeful anticipation.
So, this card...
The cover is an image of a dog.
Drinking out of a toilet.
I am not even kidding.
Somewhat apprehensive, I open it to read:
"The secret to getting well soon? Get plenty of fluids."
...I nearly wet myself. Ironic, no?
I started snort laughing, which was probably bad because she then jumped for joy and said, "See!! It's perfect! It's a DOG, and he's IN THE TOILET!!!!!!!"
To be honest, I don't even know what I told her. I think something about it not saying "happy birthday" so it didn't "count" as a birthday card.
I grabbed a monkey-themed (of course, you saw that coming, right?) group card and herded her towards the bake shop.
Where she went straight to the birthday cake binder, loudly saying NO to "stupid boy cakes" like Thomas and Iron Man. Apparently my co-worker should have gotten the purple Dora princess wand cake, but I am a dolt who does not have good taste in cakes because that's not what we got.
She actually DID pick the winner, a chocolate crumble bundt cake.
In line, waiting to check out, she suddenly announces (loudly, of course): "HUH!! We FORGOT the ice cream!" and started to leave the line. I calmly informed her there was no need for ice cream, and we had what we needed.
In the car on the way home, she asked what time I would be picking her up to take her to the party.
I had to explain that this was for Mommy's friend, at work, and it wasn't going to really be a "PARTY" party, just something at work, so unfortunately, Monkey wouldn't be there.
There was a sad pause.
From the back seat, I get:
"Well, who's going to do the decorations?"
I said, "There aren't going to be any decorations, I don't think."
She nodded, solemnly, and then said:
"That's why I should BE there."
Thwarted by my card choice, she decided to make her own card for my friend. I should've taken a picture before giving it to her, because it was friggin EPIC Monkey, in all her glory.
She drew a picture of the cake. It kind of looks like an igloo.
Next to the cake?
Who is eating the cake.
Or, maybe fighting it-- it's hard to tell, really.
OMG, do I love this kid.